transition-ING

http://innercortex.com/
http://innercortex.com/
http://innercortex.com/
http://innercortex.com/
http://innercortex.com/

you get the point :)

dont.let.it.pass.you

People continue to disappoint me. I don't know what it is I do or I've done that makes the people I surround myself with temporary. They all manage to find a way out when their part of the story is not even close to finish yet. Some people lose interest and some are just too afraid to take a chance. I see people everyday, walking the earth clueless to what they want and oblivious to what they have. They want to do something for themselves but they never find anything worthy of their full attention. Jack of all trades, master of none. I see people everyday living in yesterday, regretting and dwelling the past, the unchangeable past.

Regret, I don't understand it, why do something if you even have the slightest doubt of regretting it later on. Or even simply, why regret the things you've already done, time only moves forward so shouldn't we train our minds to do the same. I guess that's the same reason why people continue to leave. They lack the ability to look deep enough into the perhaps, the maybe, the possibly that they walk away before they even get in.

Isn't life about the interactions, the people that enter it whether we chose to or not. Isn't it about the things we do or don't do and how we deal with it. What are people so scared of? There's really not much to it. Before you know it, you're old, wrinkled and unable. Disability is not so bad when you look at inability. When you're truly unable to do anything whether you want to or not. So why not do the things you want and need while you can. While the chance is still there.

The only fear we should have is having to look back when we're on our deathbed, not knowing what could have been, if only we had tried or tried harder.

The sound of quiet contemplation

When you see things before they happen.
When you're hurt before getting hit.
When you're looking for a sign, anything to hold on to, and to hope for.
When you're face flat on the floor before you even get to stand on your feet.
When you lose something before even gaining it.
When the sky turns gray before the sunrise.
When it pours before it rains.
When you feel completely helpless.
When it's as hard to close your eyes as you open them.
When you wakeup into dream and sleep in reality.
When the world turns upside down before it's even fully formed.
When breathing seems like a workout.
When nothing's going your way.

And no one can notice nor understand you.

When you're dead before getting the chance to live.


The feeling is as unique as your very self, but the process,...well it's universal.

A momentary lifetime

Do you ever imagine yourself standing on a cliff. The ocean right before your very eyes as waves crash upon rocks so old as the water right beneath your feet.

You look into the distance wishing the wind could take you with it. To soar above the calm and stormy seas below you, sailing across wherever the wind will take you. It would bring you over tiny uninhabited islands surrounded by white sandy beach populated by nothing but trees as green as the Earth once was and exotic wildlife living to survive another day. Birds, tankers, airplanes full of people would pass you and you notice them as little as they notice you. The clouds are now above and below you, blanketing your view of the earth and the rest of the universe. You are stuck in between.

It's uncertain when you will arrive at your destination, and even that is unknown all by itself. But it doesn't matter. For at that very moment, you finally feel a part of something, being away but completely one with nature. And you no longer feel pain nor fear nor anger nor sorrow. There's absolutely nothing you can worry about even if you tried. You feel neither young nor old, nor aging. You are just what you are in that instance: unchained, able and free-spirited. You feel the world changing and adapting to your nature and not the other way around.

There are moments in our lives when all our worries seem to briefly disappear. So short and limited yet they can last a lifetime.
I live for those moments.

Umpteen hours in a day

There are theoretically 24 different timezones in the World, running every second and every minute of the day continuously. (Without taking into account places that do or don't use daylight savings time). So to the bare minimum, ideally, there are at least 24 different people living in all different times of the day.

In some cases, if the timing is perfect, it's possible to have a day last up to around 47 hours. (It took me a while looking at my globe lamp to figure this out) If a person moves from the west side to the east side of the international date line at the appropriate time. Now that's not even that complicated, how about living right at the North (and South) Pole? What timezone do they operate and well how do they tell when the day starts and ends? Maybe there's no right timezone.

A day is defined as a full rotation of the Earth about its axis and lasts for approximately 24 hours. But whether you get more or less than 24 hours in your day, it doesn't really matter. What matters is what you do with what you have. Like a lot of things in life, a day is valued with how you spend it and in most cases, who you spend it with.

You may find yourself having 47 hours for one day, but if you don't spend it the way you want or need to spend it, what is it really worth? They say our days here on Earth is numbered, but does it really matter when you don't use every single unit of your time remaining to its fullest potential?


Find what it is you deserve, what it is you want, and/or what it is you need and go for it. As cliché as it may be, life is for living and you have full control of it...right now!

"What is the point of being alive if you don't at least try to do something remarkable"
-John Green (An Abundance of Katherines)

Pennies

Pennies are worth more than a cent...

Try and think of the many things a penny can be used for other than its value as money. Its copper like substance, rounded edges, faces, pictures, numbers engraved onto its very surface is usually more than one cent.

It's a coin, one with two sides which can be and is often used as a choice decider.
An entertainer, for it can spin for a limited time and can give a person excitement in times of (severe) boredom.
A souvenir of a country or a place or a time, some even have machines that turn them into pendant like oval shaped souvenirs in remembrance of a landmark.
A flat head screwdriver replacement.
A collectors item, a piece of history.
A poking device for things such as a stuck quarter in the vending machine.
A wish at a wishing well.
A good luck charm when found randomly.
Or perhaps a very non-lethal, or lethal, depending on certain conditions, weapon when thrown or dropped at something or someone.
But most of all, it is one cent, five cents, a dollar and a million dollars, for all money starts with one penny, one cent.

With the one purpose of its creation, many other uses arise and perhaps we can learn something from that. We may feel that we are created for a single purpose or goal in life, and sure some people have proven it to be for their case. But its only appropriate to discover and explore and appreciate the many other uses we may have for our life along the way.

The infinitesimal can make universes.

There's a heavy weight lingering in my mind.

Pulling not only my thoughts, but also my thinking.

Not the content but the process, the way

ideas come into being.

This burden brings it down

like a boulder on top of a hill

One tiny push can escalate into mayhem and

I start to lose grasp on which way is right or what is real

The perception is also altered like a cold covering a disease.

Disguising itself with the season and its surroundings.

As others come out of it, the virus becomes unbearably strong and takes over

the body and soul.

Until I become neither better nor worse

Neither content nor sad

Neither dead nor alive.

---

Do not worry of how things are changing but be watchful of how it changes you.

Your way of life, even to the way you take a breath.

For an infinitesimal change in you has far greater weight than a complete change of everything else.

A promise

To the 0 readers i have haha, this is a promise to make more posts on this blog.
I usually just post stuff on my dailybooth, tumblr or facebook note when I'm lazy.

But as my final year as a student pilot comes to a near close. And so begins my journey of a commercial pilot, if I still have this, it would probably have more content of right now unknown things.

We shall see

Happy New Year!!

My summer "vlog"

With the days filled with sadness that just passed and the slow but sure steady race of moving forward and getting back in the air, I felt a sense of nostalgia so once I got home from Cynthia's funeral, I started re-watching some of my videos and this one I remembered the most because I had just done it this past summer.

So with my lack of blogging over the summer as I promised at the beginning of it, I present you this video which wrapped up my whole entire summer.

Summer COOP 2010 video

I had to use our schools video streaming program because youtube would delete the audio which has content I obviously don't have copyrights to.

RIP Aviators

I have written a post about the passing of a Seneca grad of 2009 earlier this year and it is unfortunate that I have to write another for 3 more.

It's been 8 days since Aziz, Cynthia, and Lloyd took off for flight, and although their physical bodies along with the airplane (C-GSCZ) came down to an unfortunate landing, their souls continue to soar the skies above us. It has been 8 days of thinking and trying to understand what has happened. 8 days of random triggering of the deepest burden of sadness I have ever felt. 8 days of feeling remorse and condolonces and sometimes thinking of when are we going to wake up from this. 8 days of what if this or what if that and knowing that no matter how many what ifs we can think of, it won't bring them back.
But most important of all, the past 8 days have been spent remembering their great loving nature and celebrating their short-lived lives.

Today was a very special day, and although Cynthia has yet to be laid to rest, we have taken this day to celebrate each and every one of them and how they have impacted each of us in their own little or big way.Seeing the turn out today and the many others wishing they were able to come was just a confirmation and sometimes wake up call to what it really means to be part of Seneca Aviation.

Pilots of all kinds in the industry, alumni, staff and faculty, and those that I haven't seen in a long time or haven't even met yet were there to pay tribute to the lives lost on that dreadful Thursday evening. What a remarkable sight I thought, as I reminisce and say my last goodbye to Aziz, Cynthia and Lloyd.

To many people, we may look like security guards or other alike. To some that know we are pilots, have not a clue of what it is to be truly a pilot, especially that from Seneca. And to the few that have been where we are right now, know how hard yet truly rewarding it is to be part of this camaraderie.
Today gave a brand new meaning to what I often call my second family that is Seneca Aviation and I am forever grateful to be apart of such a tightly-knit community.

This profession and more importantly, this passion we have chosen is a dangerous one and although this loss has taken a great toll on us, we mustn't fear of what lies ahead because of this. Instead, we must take the lives they have lived and use it for strength and inspiration to continue to do what it is we truly love above all the rest.

I sat inside one of the Beech Bonanzas today, the one which I flew with Aziz and Cynthia just two days prior the accident in fact, and as hard as it was to try and understand what has happened and the pain it felt when I had tried to visualize being in that airplane, I know full well that what they would want is for us to get back on that horse and fly with them once again.

Theodore Roosevelt once wrote:
"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause, who at best knows achievement and who at the worst if he fails at least fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat."

oneness

I have been told countless times that no man is an island and that everyone needs someone in order to live.
Yes. I agree, but to a certain extent.

We always need someone, but we don't always need someone else. We always need ourselves.

Independent is defined as being free from outside control; or not depending on another's authority. And well, I can honestly say that I am not independent, although I strive to be.
I believe there are a lot of things in life where we just need to walk the walk and do it alone.
Growing up for example, sure our past experiences with others have produced a vast majority of what has shaped us to be what we are right now. But if it wasn't for individualism and independence, we wouldn't even be able to get out of that experience and learn from it.

True happiness is about our own perception of happiness and without knowledge of what it is that we want  or need, we cannot ever find it.

I have learned a couple of weeks ago that this 30 year old woman had arranged a wedding to marry herself. She said it was to acknowledge her love for herself and I am beginning to understand what she meant. We need to love ourselves before we can truly love others. Sure we can be selfless, and it is nice to put others before ourselves but it is in our human nature to think of ourselves, so why don't we do it enough?

Maybe it's not the achievement of happiness that truly matters, maybe its the pursuit of it. The extremes and measures that we would go through to attain it is when true self-fulfilled living really start.

Be your own hero

A hero is defined as someone of distinguished courage ability, admired for his brave deeds and noble qualities.


Some or most of us have heroes we look up to. It could be someone who has done significant things that affected history of mankind or history of ourselves, our families, or a group of people. It could be someone notable and have books written about, or it could be as simple as our own mothers or grandparents.


It is not wrong to have these people to look up to, in fact it is almost encouraged but its quite possible that its hard NOT to have a hero. Almost all of us have someone or something to look up to, and it keeps us going and it makes us want to do great things for others and the lives that have been given to us. However this shouldn't be a limit. This should be a start of something great.


There's a reason we do things the way we do, and there's a reason why we keep doing things over and over. It is almost like we're in training and we train ourselves to situations and feelings and the kind of thinking and acting that we do. So why do we train? Why do we bother with falling in love when we know we would probably get hurt, or why do we rise when we know we're prone to fall at any moment of our life. Is it because we want to be heroes ourselves? Maybe.


But I think it's for something greater, it's for the unexpected. When what we don't see or know come up and tests our abilities. When these things finally do happen, there's a saying that we should keep in mind.


We do not rise to the level of our expectations (occasion). We fall to the level of our training.


- Archilochus, Greek Soldier, Poet, c. 650 BC


Some things happen to us that catch us off guard, or so it seems. We may think we're not ready for something, but in reality, we have been trained for this. All those days that we wake up and get through 24 hours of a day, its not uneventful...its training.


So there's no need to rise to the occasion and feel like we need to be heroic, we just need to fall back to the level of our training and keep our composure. In our own little ways, thats what makes the heroes, heroes...its not something they wake up to one day and reaches for...thinking I want to be a hero... It's how they keep their composure and keep doing what they're doing when things change is what makes them heroic.

Value of a day

Life generally begins at birth, we start counting our years of age by the time we are born. There are many points in our lives where we also begin the first of firsts. Our first food, first word, first steps, a lot of firsts. Sometimes we get caught up with one of these firsts and end up doing it more and more, these are our likes and dislikes so to speak. You then continue on with your life, you know there are school and work, and family and whatever it is that we do.

Every single day of our lives we encounter something different.  The things we do in our day may exactly be the same as of yesterday or the day before but there’s always something there to make each and every day unique and different to every other day. This could start as early as the time you wake up until the last visual image you see at night when you sleep. Many times our days are just routine; we wake up, eat, take a shower, go to work, come home, eat, and then sleep. During these days, we often attenuate the value of the day and we usually just live that day as if it was a bag of candy so full and unlimited like that in a candy factory.

Every single year we celebrate many different holidays and occasions: New Year’s Day, Easter, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and most especially our very own birthdays. Now every year has many different mysteries in store for us ahead, but to some people, they only celebrate their birthday as a mere occasion, just like any other. There are those moments of course that are highlights of our life, like our 18^th birthday or 21^st or any other birthday that has some kind of significant meaning behind it.  Although sometimes people work so hard or are too busy that they may even forget their own birthday, they don’t really cherish it even though at any given point for the next 365 days, that very birthday they didn’t really celebrate could be their last.

Our lives are really pieces of different lives, or moments of our lives put together, sometimes we remember certain things more clearly than others, and maybe there’s a reason for that. One of these moments could be the happiest day of your life like that of when you get married, or as tragic as losing someone you truly love, whichever it is, for some mysterious way we usually remember the things that affect our lives and the people we are more than the ones that have less likely to have affected us. And these moments are like those flashes of images that you will never be able to forget for the rest of your life, unless you get Alzheimer’s, even then you may forget everything and only remember that moment stuck in your head.

Anyways, I’ve probably rambled on too many things that I’ve lost most of you, and I must say this wasn’t really thought of carefully but forgive me.

What I’m trying to say is to find that value in everything around you, find its worth or make it known. We celebrate our birthdays not because we were taught to or everyone else does it, but because it’s an identification, a reward, a trophy, or some sort of recognition to yourself that you’ve made it through the past year with all its troubles and tribulations and rewards, that you’ve conquered what you thought a year ago was unconquerable. And it allows you to peek into the year ahead and see if you can make it through another year of YOUR LIFE.

Living life as a routine, as if each day was the same as every other day, as if you know for certain that there will always be tomorrow,  is not so intriguing or rewarding because if you don’t value the day, at the end of it you don’t really feel like you’ve accomplished anything. It’s almost fully true that there will always be tomorrow, but you don’t know if there will be a tomorrow for you! So seize and live the day, wake up each day as if it were your last, and put a value on it. 24 hours may seem like a long time, but all that matters is that at the end of it, you have faced all that you can, and that you couldn’t possibly have done any more that you already have. No regrets.

Sure there will be lots of firsts of a lot of things for you, and it’s great but remember as surely as there are firsts of things, there are also lasts of things. We technically started living our life at the time we are born, but sometimes we need to truly live life or relive life. Surely there’s birth, life and living, dying, and death but it’s not necessarily always in this order. Just make sure you live life, if you feel like you’ve died, then relive again. Put a value on everything and earn it.